Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Practice Dr. Phil's Life Law #8

In an article posted on Dr Phil's website, he lists ten "Life Laws" which in one way or the other affect each of us as we live our lives. 


I personally think that #8 "We teach people how to treat us" is especially pertinent to me as an educator. 

I either teach people (including students) to treat me with dignity and respect, or I don't. I cannot demand respect or dignity, nor is it something I earn by wages. Instead, as Dr. Phil states, it is something we teach others the way want to be treated. 

This means we are responsible for the mistreatment that we get at the hands of someone else. It is not their responsibility if we have failed to teach them. And if you, like me, believe that everyone can learn, then it is up to us to continually find ways to teach the dignity and respect until it is learned. 

As a teacher, coach, administrator or other party having authority (perceived or real) can shape another persons behavior, we choose to teach them what they can get away with and what they cannot.

But what is dignity and respect? Sometimes we don't demonstrate or model these two traits in our classrooms, because in our rooms it can become "my way or the highway" culture. "Because I said so," should never be uttered, stated and never said in a loud voice. The classroom, the school in general, should always be a safe environment where dignity and respect flows more frequently than the markers on the white boards.

Dignity from the World English Dictionary states, "the state or quality of being worthy of honor." I read this to also mean value. Each life is valuable. We live in a throw away or disposable word and value or worth is declining in our material possessions and that sometimes transfer over to people. What "value" do you bring to me? "You are no longer of any use to me." "Oh, my, this is old, I need a new one." Expressions of value, worth, honor and dignity should be expressed verbally and most importantly through our actions in the classroom. If I show you (demonstrate) value, respect and honor to you, then you will be able to positively model it to others and then to me through correct behavioral responses. 

Respect - as I type the letters of the word I'm reminded of Aretha Franklin's wonderful rendition of Otis Redding's song "R-E-S-P-E-C-T." The story of how it came to be recorded is just as dynamic as the singer herself. 


While this recording is award winning, iconic, and a lot of fun to sing to it does not tell us much about how to gain respect nor teach respect to our students. For that I turned to Dr. Michele Borba an internationally-recognized educational psychologist and her website posting of "35 Activities Your Students Can Do to Learn Respect." 

This listing of activities is adaptable to appropriate ages and grade levels and can be used in concert with academics (#9 can be used as an observation for collecting data and then graphing/charting that data in groups or as individual assignments (see CCSS.MATH.CONTENT.1.MD.C.4; CCSS.MATH.CONTENT.2.MD.D.10; CCSS.MATH.CONTENT.HSS.IC.B.4; and so forth)

Another great blog post for teaching students how to demonstrate respect comes from The Teachers Lounge. The listings of idea, strategies and videos produced by students give inspiration and provide examples that "take care of business" or "TCB" as the lyrics remind: 

R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Find out what it means to me
R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Take care, TCB

Teach dignity and respect. Teach others how you wish to be treated. Dignity and respect should become as routine as blinking.












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